Sunday, September 30, 2012

pug lovin' from around the world

This is Loca, a pug living in Ireland, and she comes with a very catchy song and adorable affliction.

Friday, September 28, 2012


I looked up from my book while walking Biggie and I don't know if it was the right lighting or if my glasses just needed to be cleaned but the stretch of grass we were next to looked really pretty.
I tucked my book under my arm and dug into my pocket for the camera. I had powered it on and went to aim it when

do you see that? He's not beholding the beauty. This little jerk is pooping in my shot. Look at his lifting lady-leg. Blech.

We moved on and and came across this little guy

I was going to leave him there but when I sat down to read the dog started to get bored and was trying to rough house me so I sacrificed the stuffy.

Also, Biggie is really bad at playing

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Biggie hates... UPDATED

... having his nails clipped.

   This dog is the absolute most irrational piece of shit when it comes to getting his nails done. It is never not a struggle and it always ends in carnage.
   This video is from earlier this year — listen carefully to hear him summoning dog demons from the depths of hell:

 Yes, we're laughing at him. It seems totally cruel but there's just no other way. He's been in our lives for eight (for Elliott) and five (for me) years and knows he has to get his nails clipped but still won't chill.
   We rarely hit his little dog-vein and if/when we do he totally deserves the accident by being a dick.
   We've tried more positions than a middle-aged couple rediscovering their sexuality; the only stress-free nail session Biggie has ever had was when some blonde woman from Orillia cinched him up on a metal table and had at him.

ah hah! the correlating picture of the one successful attempt

Never has it worked in any other environment.
   Here's a more recent video (from today). You can see that we've gotten so. much. better at this.

Check out the souvenir he left me : 

He's awful.

Monday, September 24, 2012


... sacrifices comfort for altitude.

   I have slept on that pillow and it's like sleeping on a burlap sack stuffed with under-ripe avocados.
   I don't know where this weird spirit of competitiveness comes from. Just because you're up there doesn't mean you're better than me, canine.
   Look at him... passive aggressively smelling his forearm. What a jerk.

Stay tuned for video. It'll show exactly why his nails are so incredibly long (spoiler: it's because he completely runs this household).

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Biggie loves... UPDATED

warm laundry
and shedding.

I think I've got a full-fledged "fuck you, Dana" on my hands. Look!

Paranoid delusions aside, I think he's actually grinning:

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Biggie loves...

   Biggie has completely hairless armpits and he's a creep about them.

   He loves getting them scratched or rubbed. Both the boyfriend and I have fallen victims to forcible armpit-rubbings while we are sleeping. We often wake up intimately stroking his pits.
   It's incredibly perverse and it shames us.

Biggie loves it so much that we never say no.

However, he does not enjoy a flubbering in them.

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